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Never Split the Difference: Negotiating as If Your Life Depended on It Audio CD – CD, 17 May 2016
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A former international hostage negotiator for the FBI offers a new, field-tested approach to high-stakes negotiationswhether in the boardroom or at home.
After a stint policing the rough streets of Kansas City, Missouri, Chris Voss joined the FBI, where his career as a hostage negotiator brought him face-to-face with a range of criminals, including bank robbers and terrorists. Reaching the pinnacle of his profession, he became the FBIs lead international kidnapping negotiator. Never Split the Difference takes you inside the world of high-stakes negotiations and into Vosss head, revealing the skills that helped him and his colleagues succeed where it mattered most: saving lives. In this practical guide, he shares the nine effective principlescounterintuitive tactics and strategiesyou too can use to become more persuasive in both your professional and personal life.
Life is a series of negotiations you should be prepared for: buying a car, negotiating a salary, buying a home, renegotiating rent, deliberating with your partner. Taking emotional intelligence and intuition to the next level, Never Split the Difference gives you the competitive edge in any discussion.
About the Author
Tahl Raz uncovers big ideas and great stories that ignite change and growth in people and organizations. He is an award-winning journalist and coauthor of the New York Times bestseller Never Eat Alone. When not researching or writing, he coaches executives, lectures widely on the forces transforming the new world of work, and serves as an editorial consultant for several national firms. He invites readers to e-mail him at TR@TahlRaz.com and to visit his website at www.TahlRaz.com.
Chris Voss is one of the preeminent practitioners and professors of negotiation skills in the world. He is the founder and principal of The Black Swan Group, a consulting firm that provides training and advises Fortune 500 companies through complex negotiations. He currently teaches at the University of Southern California's Marshall School of Business and Georgetown University's McDonough School of Business, and has lectured at other leading universities, including Harvard Law School, the MIT Sloan School of Management, and Northwestern University's Kellogg School of Management.
Michael Kramer is an AudioFile Earphones Award winner, a finalist for the prestigious Audie Award for Best Narration, and recipient of a Publishers Weekly Listen-Up Award. He is also an actor and director in the Washington, DC, area, where he is active in the area's theater scene and has appeared in productions at the Shakespeare Theatre, the Kennedy Center, and Theater J.
- Publisher : Harper Business; Unabridged edition (17 May 2016)
- Language : English
- Audio CD : 1 pages
- ISBN-10 : 1504735056
- ISBN-13 : 978-1504735056
- Item Weight : 181 g
- Dimensions : 14.73 x 1.78 x 13.21 cm
- Customer Reviews:
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Top reviews from India
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Fundamental message of Mr. Voss is that human beings are emotional and irrational. Decision making is at the end of the say an emotional decision. The historical theories on negotiations are built on human beings rational and both the sides developing "win win" solutions. However, in a hostage crisis, it may not be possible to have a win win outcome. And therefore the title of the book -- never split the difference.
Mr. Voss's negotiation approach is roughly as follows:
1. Listen to the other party carefully. Mr. Voss believes that people wish to be understood and accepted and listening is the best way to do that.
2. Second thing that he emphasises is to spot the emotion in the other party, summarise/ paraphrase what the other person is saying. Summarising may not be by accepting what the other person is saying but by "labelling it". This way the counter party feels safe, understood and develops trust. This makes the other person more open to ideas.
3. People like autonomy and control. Allowing them to say no is often a great way to understand their reservations and also gives them the feeling that they are in control. Understanding their resistance can open up things.
4. Watch out for the phrase "That's right". Human beings like to be understood and positively affirmed. Once that happens, it is possible to get a positive breakthrough.
5. Importance of asking callibrative questions by using words such as "What/ When/ How/ Who". As the author says, this a way of saying no, without saying no and giving the other person the illusion of control.
6. Importance of the parties feeling that they have been accorded "Fair Treatment"
7. Anchoring proposals to get the desired outcome.
At the end, the author emphasises the importance of self control and emotional regulation and using the same tools that are needed in any relationship of understanding the other party, building trust and rapport, making the other party feel our empathy and then getting them to do things that we want them to do.
The real life examples make this a fun and engaging book to read. It is well written and easy to read. I give it my highest recommendation.
Some concepts appear to be so simple that people don 't think they are powerful. When the same concept is put in a hostage narrative, it becomes rivetting & memorable . Eg Chris has writes about a strategy called unconditional positive regard - a strategy that if you read ,without his story ,would seem so basic & boring it would slip off your brain like water off a duck's back . But Chris shows you how he used it to get a hardcore bad guy - a murderer - a cold hearted killer , to give up his demand of a ransom which was - hold your breath - $ 10 MILLION ! I have used this strategy several times & have benefitted enormously after reading the book , though I knew of the strategy before . So "how" Chris teaches , is "what" he teaches . Read this book . Mind map it to discover some exciting new ways to negotiate & rediscover some old strategies which are in the dark corners of your mind , which you ll feel like dusting & throwing into the full glare of sunlight & the most important - USING it to become a better & richer human being
However, the font is just so small that you get a headache and the page looks dense and cluttered. However, if you can bear the font, then go ahead because unlike most other negotiation books this one is based on hand off approach that has been improved by author while working for FBI.
1. It tells how to understand the other person’s mind.
2. It gives you step by step approach to win an upper hand at a negotiation.
3. The advice is very easy to implement, and it works, as I’ve tried it.
4. The book is also easy to read, and it doesn’t drag too much.
5. It’s also a very short read.
6. It gives you tips to exploit the other person’s mind to gain an upper hand in a negotiation.
The long version -
Negotiation is an important skill. Everyone negotiates for almost everything. But it's one of the most overlooked concepts of human interaction. We negotiate everyday with almost everyone we meet. This book will help you master the art of negotiation, not just in your professional life but also personal.
The book is very crisply written, with each chapter explaining different topics related to negotiation. Each chapter starts off with an anecdote, and the principle is explained as you progress through the chapter. The author gives you step by step approach to get what you want in any negotiation. One of the best things about the book is that the advice is very easy to implement. It surely isn't rocket science; all it takes is a bit of practice and you can become the master of negotiation. The chapters also contain various hostage situations where the hostages are saved by following the guidelines provided in the book.
There aren't too many studies mentioned to overwhelm you, just enough to make you understand the human psyche and how the mind of the other person operates during a negotiation and how you can exploit it to win an upper hand in your negotiation.
This book was very easy to read and implement. This is by far the best book on negotiation for modern times. Read it and you can play with the minds of people during a negotiation.
Top reviews from other countries
I had high hopes for this book... waste of money. I've just thrown it into the bin!
This stuff works a treat if, and only if you are willing to put the methods into practice
on a daily basis. I am using it constantly every single day and it has produced amazing results.
As Chris Voss said "everything is a negotiation" and I would agree 100% it's just i've never noticed it before..but i do now.
Try it out for yourself, you will be surprised at how effective it is.
Just be prepared to put in the work required to learn a new skill. I really had to laugh at one of the negative reviews that implied they should
now be a skilled negotiator as if reading the book once worked like some sort of osmosis straight from Chris Voss.
Yeah...get real mate.
A couple of weeks after starting the book I negotiated a vendor at work from a 'list price' of about £68,000 for some equipment down to about £22,000*, partly by applying techniques from this book. Given that I spent £4.45 on the book, I think it's paid for itself by now.
*Obviously, having read the book my final offer was not a rounded number. Read it yourself, and you'll see what I mean.
I am half way through the book, it took a while to read as I have decided to digest the techniques and to see how effective they are.
I have applied mirroring, showing empathy labelling techniques when I communicating with my daughter and I found I have stopped saying no to her automatically and the relationship has improved since.
The poor printing is not the whole book and only on a dozen pages. But still, very disappointing.
Reviewed in Canada on 9 March 2020
The poor printing is not the whole book and only on a dozen pages. But still, very disappointing.