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Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can't Stop Talking Kindle Edition
Audio CD, Audiobook, CD, Unabridged
Quiet is a very timely book, and Cain's central thesis is fresh and important. Maybe the extrovert ideal is no longer as powerful as it was; perhaps it is time we all stopped to listen to the still, small voice of calm -- Daisy Goodwin, The Sunday Times
Susan Cain's Quiet has sparked a quiet revolution. In our booming culture, hers is a still, small voice that punches above its weight. Perhaps rather than sitting back and asking people to speak up, managers and company leaders might lean forward and listen -- Megan Walsh, The Times
I can't get Quiet out of my head. It is an important book - so persuasive and timely and heartfelt it should inevitably effect change in schools and offices -- Jon Ronson, The Guardian
A startling, important, and readable page-turner, Naomi Wolf, author of The Beauty Myth --This text refers to the paperback edition.
About the Author
- ASIN : B0074YVW1G
- Publisher : Penguin; 1st edition (29 March 2012)
- Language: : English
- File size : 657 KB
- Text-to-Speech : Enabled
- Enhanced typesetting : Enabled
- X-Ray : Enabled
- Word Wise : Enabled
- Print length : 325 pages
- Best Sellers Rank: #1,528 in Kindle Store (See Top 100 in Kindle Store)
- Customer Reviews:
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Top reviews from India
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I have faced a lot of people asking the same questions repeatedly like
Why are so quiet? What are you thinking the whole time?
What will you do at home the whole day?
Why don't you mingle with all in any kind of gatherings? You look so serious is there any problem? And in addition to this, I experience a distressing and weird reaction of my hand getting sweat and hearing my own heartbeat whenever I stand up in my classroom to speak up feeling overwhelmed while entering a shopping mall or a public market. These are the questions and experiences faced and felt for which I don't any kind of answer. So I started to search on the internet and even had a thought of consulting a psychiatrist but I didn't.
In the process, I came to know the people who are quiet, shy, solitary, etc are considered as a category called introverts. From then I have been searching to know more about introverts like articles, videos, books, etc. I have watched Susan Cain's Ted talk and longed to read this book. After reading this book I have an answer to all my questions and struggles personally experienced.
The book was well written. It gives us a detailed history of America on how the culture of outgoing, assertive, showmanship prevailed during the 20th century. It tells us the transformation of the culture of character to the culture of personality in a short period. It bursts the myth of charismatic leadership that even quiet people who think before they speak can be good leaders in their own ways. Extroverts and Introverts have their own pros and cons in every position in life and society.
The second part goes into the brains of introverted kids and tries to explore the reasons for introverted behavior whether it depends on the nature of their mind or can be nurtured while growing depending on their environments.
The next part describes us about relationships with introverts as it is said that for every three people there is one introvert so it can be your partner, brother, sister, friend and children.
It gives a detailed description and advice on how to understand and empathize with your relationships.
It is a Good Book and a definite read for everyone to understand the people around you because one third to half the world's population are introverts.
It answered all my questions about my personality, I kind of felt normal not an alien😁 anymore after reading this book.
Susan Cain is a former lawyer, an alumna of Harvard Law School, an introvert, who turned to homemaking and writing. She ‘looks back’ on her years as a Wall Street lawyer as time spent in a foreign country. “It was absorbing, it was exciting, and I got to meet a lot of interesting people whom I never would have known otherwise. But I was always an expatriate.”
That aggressive, self-assured, extroverted personality types are highly valued in competitive, materialistic, success-orientated nations like the US is well-known. Introverted, person-orientated, easygoing types tend to be regarded as second-class citizens. How extroversion became the cultural ideal in the US is dealt with in detail in Chapters 1-3. America had shifted from what Warren Susman called a ‘Culture of Character’ exemplified by Abraham Lincoln to a ‘Culture of Personality’ (under Donald Trump?) and opened up a Pandora’s Box of personal anxieties, ‘a natural product of a society that was both dog-eat-dog and relentlessly social.’ America quickly developed from an agricultural society to an urbanized, ‘the business of America is business’ powerhouse. Dale Carnegie, Madison Avenue, Hollywood, IBM, Tony Robbins, and that temple of extroversion and doyen of vocal business leadership, Harvard Business School, and televangelists, all typify the rise of extraversion. The New Groupthink organized workforces into teams, even brainstorming in groups, and created open-office plans rendering creativity in solitude impossible. The rise of the worldwide web, however, has offered some respite for introverts, spawning wondrous creations via shared brainpower.
The basic personality type that a person has is a result of all factors in the person’s upbringing, including genetics. Psychologists accept that people do not change from one basic personality type to another, even though variations are possible, tempered by their pathological characteristics. The so-called Big 5 traits: introversion/extroversion, agreeableness, openness to experience, conscientiousness, and emotional stability encompass the gamut of personality traits.
Chapters 4-7 examine the biological basis of introversion, including brain structures in amygdala and neo-cortex, which are active participants in our emotional-rational lives. Recent research work by Jerome Kagan, the author of ‘Galen’s Prophecy,’ Dr. Carl Schwartz, and Dr. Elaine Aron are cited. Extroverts’ dopamine pathways lead to an emotional state called ‘the buzz’ – a rush of energized, enthusiastic feelings with a delightful champagne bubble quality. However, this may cloud their judgment. Financial and military history is replete with examples of extroverts charging ahead when they should have withdrawn. Introverts are threat-orientated and have an inbuilt loss-avoidance system, and so are less risk-taking. Despite the variety of experiences in our lifetime, our core traits remain constant.
Part 3 of the book deals with other cultures, in this case, mainly Chinese-Americans, who are more introverted and Mahatma Gandhi, who wielded soft power with devastating effect on the British Empire.
The value of the book is in Part 4, which advises introverts on how to love and how to work in the US.
If you are an introvert in corporate America, you should spend your weekdays striving to ‘get out there, mix, speak more often, and connect with your team and others, deploying all the energy and personality you can muster’ and retreat for quiet weekends. In other words, engage in a certain level of pretend-extroversion. Identify your core personal projects, and develop a ‘restorative niche’ as Professor Brian Little advocates. (Little also extolls the book as ‘superb’.)
In personal life, introverts who are married to extroverts must both strive to understand each others’ different ways and accept the realities to resolve their differences. Parents of introverted children must expose their children gradually to new situations and people and determine the right schools to put them in. ‘The secret to life,’ the author says, ‘is to put yourself in the right lighting’ (and not to avoid the spotlight). As group dynamics contain impediments to creative thinking, whereas solitude is often a spur to creativity, companies must think twice about how to design office space to accommodate both group interactions and “rabbit holes into which Alices can tumble”.
Susan Cain presents a strong case for introverts vs. extroverts in the US, emphasizing that the more socially desirable types have limitations, while the silent minority of introverts who receive fewer social rewards have assets which make them valuable, too. There is no doubt that healthy introverts are profound thinkers and visionaries, even geniuses, such as Albert Einstein, Sigmund Freud, and Emily Dickinson. However, Susan Cain glosses over the intersection of introversion and other negative traits, such as neuroticism, schizoid behavior, delusions, and nihilism. The stress caused by social isolation and the physical exhaustion brought about by a hyperactive mind may eventually result in thought disorders and over-dependence on anxiety drugs, much of which plagues America today.
The book cover is understated, in subdued white, with the title and author’s name embossed, in sharp contrast to Americana, with red, blue, stars and stripes emblazoned in much of its merchandise.
The book is a must-read for expatriates in the USA who may find the pace loud and hectic. Just where can the true-blue introverts in the world find a sanctuary?
In Finland, of course. Finland is a famously introverted nation. Finnish Joke: How can you tell if a Finn likes you? He is staring at your shoes, instead of his own. (Page 14, ibid.)
Lucky to find and read such a great epic !
Top reviews from other countries
What if your child is an introvert and does not like to be in the centre of public attention, prefers to have a deeper relationship with a smaller group of friends and occasionally needs to recharge the energy level by being on his/her own?
My daughter turned 8 this week and she did not want to have any birthday party. She does not enjoy competitions, she is uncomfortable joining new groups and takes her time to make new friends. She enjoys playing imaginary games or reading a book. At the same time, when at home or with a small group of friends, my daughter is a bubbly, chatty girl.
As a (mostly) extrovert mum, I have made my share of mistakes with my child. When adults try to talk to my daughter and she does not reply, I jump in with the comment, “She is shy”. Worth of it, I would push my daughter to talk to adults (like ordering in the restaurants) to the extent that she would get so nervous and get a tick. That made me stop and think. I started to look for help in some books and , luckily, I came across a wonderful book by Susan Cain, Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can’t Stop.
The book does not only explain the nature of introverts and helps to understand their character better, but also gives practical advice how to make sure you help introverts not to go against their nature but let them flourish in the culture of extroverts.
Thank you Ms Cain for such a wonderful gift to the parents!
The writing is an excellent mix between research, case studies and thoughtful conclusions, all balanced so it never feels boring or overwhelming. There is a section of endnotes, and because I was reading the Kindle version, the notes were all linked – if you click on the note, it takes you to the endnotes with a longer explanation! I get happy about the little things.
The ideas are also incredibly interesting. Not everything will apply to all introverts, but I’d recommend this book to anyone – it’s really interesting to be challenged on how I view the world from an introvert perspective (like arguing – raising your voice means an attack! But for extroverts, it’s a sign of passion and involvement) and it’s really interesting to realise how those difference shape society and interactions with others.
It’s also so, so reassuring. This is me. This is some reasons why I might do the things I do, why I don’t like parties in a certain format, why I need down time when other people don’t. It’s being reminded that it’s ok to be different, and that actually there are other people out there who are similar – even if I live and work in a world that seems full of extroverts, it’s ok to need alone time, and that my strengths don’t have to lie in the same things – listening, thoughtfulness and consideration are all important, even if they come at a cost of an immediate answer or participation in small-talk. It was also reassuring to realise that being able to extrovert on occasion is normal – it just comes at more of a cost to introverts than it does to extroverts!
Interesting, thoughtful, readable and inspiring – the kind of book that leaves you thinking about it a long time after you’ve shut it.
I got this book on a recommendation on a forum where I was researching about how to be more confident a person. I've been struggling recently, becoming more senior in my role at work and so have felt pressured to be more comfortable in my own skin and get my ideas across in a way that people listen. It just doesn't come naturally to me, and I was starting to judge myself for it and feel like I wasn't good enough because everybody expects you to be a particular way.
Well, after reading this book, I would challenge anybody who makes me feel like it's not okay to be the way I am and would explain that even though I am quiet, the world still needs people like me just as much as it needs people that can grab attention from everybody in a room. And I also understand that even though I might need to be a "pseudo-extrovert" at times and can learn how to be good at public speaking and will still need to put myself in uncomfortable situations for the sake of things I believe in, I still need down-time and respect the fact that I am happiest when I have time to recharge at home or spend time with my family in a calm and cosy setting. I also think this book will help me when I have children in making sure that whether I have an introverted or extroverted child, they have all the support they can from me no matter what.
Susan Cain has an amazing writing style and I've never been kept interested to read a book like this from start to finish, as it has a lot of references to studies and usually I find this quite boring in other non-fiction books to do with health. But she keeps you involved, and forever writes about things that I'm guessing a lot of people can relate to whilst you carry on reading. She also reflects on a lot of experiences she's had with various people - again, something I don't usually enjoy, but it is written so well that I was never bored for a moment.
The book is quite long and has smaller writing than a lot of books I read, but honestly - read it. If you class yourself as an introvert, just buy it. It will change your life.
To be brutally honest, as an extrovert, I was very sceptical about this book - I was under the impression it would be soppy and introverts playing the victim card. I could not have been any more wrong!
For me this book was such an eye-opener (even though I have done MBTI before and was fairly well familiar with E v/s I) into understanding, not just introverts, but myself as an extrovert.
I could not put the book down once I started it and I would recommend everyone to read it - I've actually recommended it in my book club at work. Don't assume, as I did, that only introverts will have something to take from this book. If, like me, your other half is an introvert, this book could really help improve communication in your couple.
Talking is not always necessary - a good book and a cuppa works just as well!
Why doesn’t she want to talk about celebrities, gossip, and other pointless rubbish? Why is she so ‘rude’?
They thought I might be autistic or have social anxiety disorder.
This book has described everything I have been confused about since I was very little, and made me see that the things that are ‘wrong’ with me are actually good things. Knowledge is power, and understanding myself at last is brilliant. I feel so free.